In Thyolo
Today is the day that I learned some interesting news about my nephew (Mike's nephew), helped sell beens, groundnuts, and cabbages at the market, played some pool with a cheering squad, and finally spent the evening in the home of mummy Gondwe.
Started off in the morning (like most days do, I've noticed). Went over to Young Mittawa's for breakfast. But before going, I went and bought a huge container of cooking oil and a large bag of rice for gifts. O.k., so far, so good. Now, I started walking over to the house that Philip had led me to yesterday, but then I got a little confused about exactly which path to take. So, I asked an adult where Young Mittawa lives and the adult told a kid to lead me there. That is so typical Malawian, by the way. They don't just point the way - they're going to take you by the hand, and take you there. So, anyway, the kid walked me down a path or two and then pointed to a house. I was starting to tell the kid, "No, this is the wrong house," because it wasn't the house that I was at yesterday.
But then a young woman came out and said, "Auntie! Auntie!" and smiled, and led me into the house and sat me at a table and then she left and went back outside.
"O.k.," I thought to myself as I was sitting there, "I'm confused. This young woman is calling me 'auntie, auntie', but she is not the lady that Young Mittawa introduced me to as his wife yesterday. And this is the wrong house." I continued to sit, for about 10 minutes. Finally, the young woman came back and took me outside, and pointed to another house, and said, "You eat breakfast there. But please come back and we chat when you are finished!"
I thought, "Huh?" but then saw that the other house was the one Philip had taken me to yesterday. Now, the light was finally starting to dawn. "Is Young Mittawa keeping two women?" I thought to myself. "This is juicy, but who am I supposed to give the cooking oil and rice to?"
I walked down to the other house, cooking oil and rice in hand, and was warmly welcomed into this other house, where the table was all set up for a large breakfast. Young Mittawa gave me big hugs and said, "Sit! Sit!" The wife whom I'd been introduced to yesterday was also warmly welcoming. I'm standing there holding my cooking oil and rice, but not knowing what to do with it, so I just put it down on the floor and took a seat. The wife was very pleasant and stayed for quite a while, but Young Mittawa and I were mainly speaking in English and she didn't understand English, so eventually she went off to watch the kids.
That's when I was finally able to ask Young Mittawa, "Brother, do you have 2 wives?"
He looked slightly embarrassed, but then told all. Turns out that he had converted from Christian to Muslim (which I found shocking because he used to be a very active church member), and now had 2 wives and 2 homes to keep them in. Oh my god!
"When did all of this happen?" I asked.
It happened just a couple of years ago. His father (Mike's elder brother), apparently, was none too pleased about it, but he had "learned to accept". So, I supposed that I could "learn to accept" as well, but I laughed.
"But, brother, you should have told me," I said, "Now I don't even know what to do with this," and handed him the cooking oil and rice. "Here," I said, "You figure out whom to give it to."
He took the gifts and said thank you and said, "Don't worry, auntie, I'll share them evenly." I laughed.
O.k., so my nephew is now a Muslim with 2 wives and 2 homes. What next? Young Mittawa next walked me through Thyolo, and it was lots of fun, seeing old acquaintances. Then I asked him about an old friend named Catherine. Catherine used to sell clothes and things in the market, but I have to admit that I mainly knew her from the bars, back in those days. I was pretty sure that she had probably died, since I knew that her husband had died of AIDS. So, I was greatly surprised and pleased when Young Mittawa said, "She's around! Still selling in the market!"
As soon as we were in view of Catherine, she screamed!! Came RUNNING towards me! Almost knocked me down with enthusiasm! Left a customer, in mid-deal. The customer was standing there, with her money in her hand now, not knowing what to do, while Catherine and I laughed and laughed and embraced. Finally, I said, "Catherine! Your customer," and pointed. Catherine said something to the woman in the stall next to hers and that woman came over and finished the transaction with the customer. I later learned that that woman was Catherine's older daughter, whom I never knew, because that daughter had lived in Lilongwe when I knew Catherine.
I spent the rest of the afternoon with Catherine, helping her to sell her produce. We talked and laughed the whole afternoon, while market shoppers and other vendors looked on. At one point, I went off and bought sodas for us all (Catherine, me, the daughter, and a young son who was also there). I suggested to Catherine that I wanted to help her sell her beans and groundnuts and cabbages, so she told me how much everything cost.
As the market shoppers walked around the stalls, I kept calling out, "Come! Come! Cheapi, cheapi! Good prices!" This would make us all laugh, but by the end of the day, we couldn't
deny that we'd made some good sales. Here is a photo of Catherine and the general market scene. I'm taking it from underneath her stall.
As we talked the whole afternoon away, I never reminded Catherine of the time when she wanted to beat me up because she thought I had slept with her husband (which, of course, I hadn't). One day, Tom (her husband), came to my house to look at a beat-up bicycle that I wanted to sell. While at the house, I offered him a beer and he stayed for about 1 hour, in the middle of the afternoon. Well, word got out and apparently Catherine had decided that I'd slept with him. This is pretty typical village mentality, and I knew it, so I probably shouldn't have allowed it to happen - "there's only one reason that a man would go to a woman's home." But, anyway, I was young, so I allowed it to happen. Two nights later, I went down to "Honolulu", the local bottle store (pub). As I drove up, I saw Catherine sitting on a beer crate on the veranda, drinking a beer. Totally oblivious of any potential problem, I got out of the car and prepared to go join her. At this, she stood up, roared like a lionness, and started to charge me! Oh my god! I've never fought in all my life! This was going to be a real one-sided fight! Her fists were flying and she was yelling words like "whore" and "other people's husbands", so, being the fairly bright person that I am, I figured it out. I prepared to put my arms over my head and defend myself, when Mike (Young Mittawa's uncle and the man I used to go out with) came running out of the bottle store, together with another buddy of his, and they stopped Catherine from killing me. I tried to explain to Catherine why it was that Tom happened to find himself at my house. Even Mike did not think I'd slept with Tom, and was defending me, and trying to help me explain to Catherine. But Catherine would have none of it. Her mind was made up and she kept struggling to get loose from Mike and his buddy, who were restraining her. Eventually, she calmed down and sat back on her beer crate, but she didn't talk to me. It took about a month to get over that one. But finally, one day, without anybody ever explicitly saying, "Are we finished with this silliness yet?" we started talking again. I guess she had decided that I probably hadn't slept with her husband, after all.
So now, 15 years later, here I was, helping her sell her beans for the day. I probably didn't have to remind her of the incident. I don't think it's the kind of thing you'd just forget. Haha.
At around 4:00, I started getting bored and wanted to go off with Catherine down to the local pub and play pool. They'd installed a pool table since I was last there.
I asked Catherine, "What time do you sell until?"
She said, "Until 5:00 ... or until dark."
I said, "That's a lot of selling, isn't it? Don't you think we've sold enough for the day?"
She laughed and said, "Yes, sister, I do!"
I said, "You want to go get a beer?"
She said, "Great idea! For old time's sake," and told her daughter to make any necessary transactions.
As we were walking out of the market, several of the other vendors asked Catherine where she was going. She said, "I'm done for the day. Going to get a beer with my sister." (She didn't add, "... who once almost slept with my husband, but didn't.")
When we got to the pub, Young Mittawa was there. I asked him if Muslims were supposed to be in drinking places and he smiled shyly, but showed me that he was drinking a soda. O.k., fair enough.
Then, Paul, who used to work for Satemwa Tea Estate (and apparently still does) came walking in. Later, Catherine's older daughter, plus another person whom I didn't know, came and joined us.
I was the only one of our group playing pool, but must say it was being done with a serious cheering squad. Every time I sunk a ball, they'd roar, "Yeeaahhhh!" Made me feel bad for my opponents, but was fun anyway. Then, every time I lost a game or sat down for some other reason,
there'd be another full beer sitting there at my spot - somebody'd bought another round. Here is a picture of my latest past time. Mainly, the reason I took the picture, though, was for the advertisement - "Probably the best beer in the world." That advertisement cracks me up.
In the end, only had 3 beers, however, because at 6:00, I had to say sorry to everybody (who wanted to party all night) because I had evening plans. Had promised to spend the evening at mummy Gondwe's. So, though disappointed, Catherine, her daughter, and Young Mittawa escorted me back to the Kamotos, where daddy Kamoto drove me over to the Gondwe house on the back of his motorcycle. Had a nice night with mummy Gondwe and one of my "brothers" (her children), Charles, and Tiwonge, a grandchild (aged 18) of the Gondwes.
to do, to get to Entebbe. I will stay here in Matugga this week and visit with my good friend, Nalongo. She is Annet's sister (Annet, who came visiting a couple of months ago, when we were in Arusha). Next Friday or Saturday, I'll ride the remaining distance to Entebbe, which I think is only about 70 or 75 km.
